


The Temps

by Magus_Kuro



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Crudeness, Darn Ducks, Other, Swearing, Troll Fic, tw: rape mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 09:21:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12407580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magus_Kuro/pseuds/Magus_Kuro
Summary: Team Rocket is here to..wait, that's not Team Rocket! Who are you schmucks???





	The Temps

Brock, Ash, Misty and Pikachu stared incredulously at the three strangers who had jumped out of the bushes in front of them. It was safe to say none of them had been expecting this.

“Are you guys like, the new Team Rocket or something?” Ash asked finally. “Those are their clothes you’re wearing, right?”

“It’s a standard uniform provided to us when we were hired,” replied the woman in the trio, tugging her uniform top lower. “We’re temps, by the way. Team Rocket had vacation time built up, so we’ve been hired to do their job while they’re away.”

“So if you guys aren’t the new Team Rocket,” Misty said, “What are you guys calling yourselves? I see you still have the big R’s on your chests.”

“Oh my god, Waffles! We forgot to introduce ourselves!” the man of the trio exclaimed. “Hold on, kids, we’ll be right back.” 

Our heroes stared as Not-Team-Rocket jumped back into the bushes.

“Waffles?” Misty whispered to the others. Brock shrugged and Ash shook his head. Pikachu just looked mildly confused.

The woman jumped jumped out from behind the bushes and struck a pose. “Waffles!”

The man was right behind her, shifting to a different, semi-complimentary pose. “Rooster!”

“Team Rooster fucking things up like a bulldozer! Surrender now, or prepare to be screwed over!” The two shouted in unison. 

“Dugtrio, dugtrio, dugtrio!” yelled the third member of the group.

There were a couple beats of silence before Brock leaned over and whispered, “Is it just me or does that deformed dugtrio kind of look like a dick?”

The other three nodded. 

Meanwhile, Team Rooster had started to argue with one another. “Waffles, I really don’t like this rhyme. I know we said we’d try it, but it just doesn’t sound right.”

“Well it certainly sounds better than your duck one” Waffles retorted. “That one made us sound like rapists.”

“Couldn’t we just use a chicken pun since we’re—wait, what?” Rooster asked, looking horrified.

“Team Rooster blasting off at the speed of a duck, surrender now or prepare to get fucked? How is any of that okay? Especially with the duck?” Waffles asked. 

“And what’s wrong with ducks?” Rooster demanded. “They’re super cute and fluffy.”

Waffles started at him. “You haven’t seen it, have you?”

“Seen what?” Rooster asked, wide eyed.

“The duck video,” she replied. “You haven’t seen it, have you?”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’ve seen plenty of duck videos. I told you, they’re super cute!”

“That isn’t what I…” Waffles started. “You know what, no. You’re going to see the video, and you’re going to see it now. Sorry, kids. We’ll have to do this another day. Right now I need to break Rooster of his love of ducks.”

“Wait Waffles, we have a job to do! We can’t just leave…!” Roosted yelled as Waffles dragged him off, the penis shaped dugtrio hopping along behind them.

Our heros watched them go with disbelief all over their faces.

“Those guys are a bunch of cockwaffles,” Brock muttered. “Heh, that’s funny. Cockwaffles. That should totally be their team name.”

“Soooo…” Misty said, clearly trying to change the subject. “Why doesn’t she like ducks?”

Brock and Ash looked at one another.

“We should probably ease Misty into this,” Ash said.

“Nah, she already hates psyduck,” Brock replied. “No harm in her hating him a little more, right? Come on, Misty. I’ll show you the video.”

“Pikapi?”

Brock shrugged. “Why not. Might as well traumatize you too.”

Ash shook his head as he followed along behind them, sure this wasn’t going to end well. “Cockwaffles,” he muttered to himself. “Heh. Cockwaffles.”

**Author's Note:**

> I am not going to link to the duck video. If you haven't seen it, consider yourself lucky. Lets just say I know a little more about duck copulation that I ever wanted to in my entire existence. This fic was originally a present for MittensMcEdgelord. Now it's a present for everyone.


End file.
